What if you could live your life and not care what anyone thinks? What if you weren’t distracted and discouraged by the drama, fear-mongering, societal pressure, and financial burdens that are so much a part of our lives? What if there wasn’t anything anyone could do that could ruin your mood or your day? If you could live your life this way, that would be freedom. Freedom is not “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.” You may know your inalienable rights but the rights to truly being free may be alien to you. It’s not defined by external circumstances. Freedom is an internal condition. It’s not only freedom to, as in, do whatever you want, wherever, whenever, and however. It’s also freedom from. Freedom from is deeper and more powerful. It’s something no one can take from you. Not until you are free from can you be free to. Let’s say you win millions and millions of dollars in the lottery. Your first thought might be, “WHOO-HOO! I can quit my awful job, and have and do all the things I’ve always wanted to!” It’s true, you do have the financial freedom now to make those kinds of choices. But then, you have friends and family expecting you to cough up money for them and the government expecting you to fill their coffers. Your employer and co-workers expect your resignation, and society expects you to be resigned to volunteer for everything because they think Louie Armstrong is running “all the time in the world” in your head on a loop. Expectations. Responsibilities, real or imagined. Societal pressure. What if you lose it all? What if you lose your friends? What about maintaining, storing and insuring all the stuff you buy? You may end up more imprisoned in your life than you were before you won the lottery. But if you also have the ability to say “no” to all those requests, you would be freer. If you have the capacity to shut out the “shoulds” from your friends and family, that would be freeing. If you could take that great trip you always wanted to and not be distracted by what everyone thinks about you, what you might be missing or fearing that it could all be gone tomorrow, then you could be freer. Freedom is a state of mind. Come with me and we’ll find the road to that state. Thank you for reading, sharing, and commenting. If you’d like to receive these posts and updates in your inbox, please head to the Contact Page to subscribe.
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Sometimes Facebook Memories are wonderful, like when they remind you of awesome people and fun times. Sometimes they make you wonder. For instance, when you scroll down to other events on the same date but years earlier, and you encounter memories with previously awesome people who became awful-to-you people who are no longer in your life, and thus the previously fun memories are forever tainted. And it becomes the very last straw tossed onto a heart that is already pensive, heavy, and teetering. And rather than wallow and whine, you look for words that will lift you out of it all. Here are some that are helping me. I hope they lift you as well. Hi! You made it all the way down to the bottom. Thanks for reading and being here. It means a lot to me.
Searching and finding these quotes helped me tremendously. I hope they made you think and smile. Now go be the love. :) I know the article’s title was supposed to grab my attention, and it definitely did. I was incensed! I scanned through article to start planning my response. Since I retain what I read off of paper better than on screen, I printed it and set it aside to read in depth later. “They will pay for writing this, oh yes they will,” I mumbled under my breath. And then, life happened, as it always does. And it was late the next day before I could get back to it. When I finally sat down with it I was ready for combat. But, as I began to read the first paragraph, a thought went through my head--“Is this worth it?” “Is this worth it? OF COURSE it is! THEY need to know how wrong THEY are! There is a whole other side to the story THEY are not considering!” But as fired up as I still was, the more I thought about it, I had to decide that it really wasn’t worth it. By the time I read the article, considered a response, wrote it, edited it, then checked back again and again to see if anyone had commented further on this atrocity, it would have cost far more in terms of time and energy spent than I was really willing to put into it--time and energy that could be spent on things that are far more important to me, like my family, or writing the things I’m truly called to write about. As I’ve read other places, you don’t have to show up to every battle you’re invited to. You especially don’t have to if they don’t fit your purpose or passion. I’m not saying that responding to the article would have been a bad thing. It’s good to discuss and speak the truth in love (although, admittedly, love wasn’t my primary motivation here). But why choose what’s good when I can choose what’s better? Let those who share this purpose and passion fight this battle, because if I’m fighting their battle, I’m not fighting my own. Are they going to fight my battles for me? I’m thinking, ummm…no. And that’s what Love does: It focuses on what’s important here and now. Instead of spending the evening crafting the perfect response, my youngest son and I crafted a perfect time together, which involved chicken strips, movies, and milkshakes--all of which are tons better than aggravating articles. No one who scrolled the article’s comments would have missed mine, but my son and I would have missed an opportunity together. So the next time I see an incensing headline I will wonder if that is incense worth burning. Maybe I’ll even save myself some ink and printer paper. Thank you for reading, sharing, and commenting. If you’d like to receive these posts and updates in your inbox, please head to the Contact Page to subscribe.
I highly recommend a book called Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less, by Greg McKeown. I’m listening to it for the second time, but probably not the last. Not only is it immensely helpful but it’s read by the author himself, who is British and has the cool accent. McKeown says, “Essentialism is not about how to get more things done; it’s about how to get the right things done. It doesn’t mean just doing less for the sake of less, either. It is about making the wisest possible investment of your time and energy in order to operate at our highest point of contribution by doing only what is essential.” I’ve greatly considered what my highest point of contribution would be. I’ve come to the conclusion that outside of loving on my family and friends, my highest contribution is communicating through writing and speaking. This is my calling, and what I can best offer the world with my one and only life. In order to maximize my highest contribution, I must minimize, even eliminate, other things that are not essential. This Saturday, my church is hosting its annual Great Giveaway. Church members and attenders gather used clothing and household items and give them away to the local community. Between those who donate items, sort them, carry them into the building, display them, work the tables, make and serve lunch, give haircuts, take family photos, and provide information for other local service providers, there are a LOT of people involved in this act of love to the community. Outside of donating some items, I have never worked this event. The same is true for many other church events. I have felt a little guilty about that. But not anymore. There are many servants in my congregation. To my knowledge I am the only working writer. Those servants love with their hearts and hands at events like the Great Giveaway. I love with my heart and hands through my keyboard with skits, movies, children’s books, blog posts. It’s all love, it just looks different for each one. And, essentially, that’s the way it’s supposed to be. Now if I could just type with a cool British accent. Thank you for reading, sharing, and commenting. If you’d like to receive these posts and updates in your inbox, please head to the Contact Page to subscribe.
Our kitchen table is one of the first things you see when you walk into our house. It was my grandmother’s dining room set, beautiful dark wood and green fabric high-backed chairs. They remind me of her, and I love that I can see and use them every day. With its centralized location and large surface area, the table is a tremendously convenient place to pile mail, bills, papers that need attention, wallets, pocket knives, eye glasses, cell phones, and empty gum wrappers. I’m not entirely sure how piles multiply like fruit flies on wood surfaces, but they do. It stresses me out, and so I have declared the kitchen table to be a Clutter Free Zone. I have designated boxes, in other rooms, for cell phones, wallets, etc, and also for papers, bills, etc. I have asked that they be utilized. Many times. Out of all the living space we have, the table is 24 square feet. That leaves *does math quickly in her head* quite a lot of space for all the clutter that previously landed on the table. If you don’t like my designated places, go find your own. It’s your clutter. I know transitions are gradual and new skills take time to perfect (especially for us older folks), so I’ve tried to be patient and extend grace (sometimes through gritted teeth). The boys and I do pretty well with this new plan. The main battle is with my husband. Unfortunately for us both, it’s a battle I am losing. My reactions to the continuance of kitchen table clutter vary from slightly-annoyed-so-I-nicely-place-the-offending-items-where-they-are-supposed-to-go, to hell-bent-on-destroying-every-item-within-the-area-that-is-not-mine. It’s a respect issue to me. I have asked that something stop happening. I have provided alternatives that are neither difficult to find nor use. I have been patient and extended grace when mess ups happen (although I have been known to be quite vocal about it). Several nights ago, as I was planning my next tirade, a tiny question entered my even tinier mind. Is there any way I’ve been disrespectful, where he has asked me to do something and I’ve not done it? That’s when I felt the 2x12 gouge my cornea (metaphorically speaking, of course). Guilty as charged. I hate when that happens. My husband has asked for us to go to bed earlier. Repeatedly. As in, over a few years’ time. Believe me, I have tried. For some reason my brain capacity, creativity, and energy level seem to surge about 9:30pm, and all of the things I haven’t thought of or done the rest of the day take on a sense of urgency. Shutting them off has proven more difficult than I imagined. I won’t go into all the ways I’ve tried to deal and failed. I could offer them but they’re still excuses. He has asked, I have attempted, but I have largely given up. Speck in his eye: 1 Plank in my eye: 0 So to that end, I can’t complain about address the table until I first address a consistently earlier bedtime. Because *grumbleundermybreath* that’s what love does. So I am, once again, taking steps to get to bed earlier. I’ve learned about the Night Shift feature on my phone, which I’ve told to turn off the stimulating blue backlight at 9pm. I’m changing my self-talk, telling my brain that as the phone’s blue light shuts off at 9pm, so does my brain. If there’s something I need to look up after that, I write a note about it instead of googling it. I’m walking the plank, if you will (see what I did there?). It’s a process, I know, but the past three nights we have gotten to bed earlier, though to varying degrees. I’m focusing on progress, not perfection. I’m being gentle but firm with myself while I make this transition, because honestly we both need a LOT more sleep. And after the bedtime situation is adequately under control, I will turn my attention, gently but firmly, back to the Battle of Kitchen Table. I think my grandmother would be pleased. Thank you for reading, sharing, and commenting. If you’d like to receive these posts and updates in your inbox, please head to the Contact Page to subscribe.
Evil wears many faces. Some obvious, others insidious. There are different types and calibers. Evil is layered, like the varying veins of sediment in a cliff face. Cries of “this must be stopped” and “be the change you wish to see in the world” abound. But the evil that happened in Charlottesville, and millions of other places every day, will not be stopped by change alone. It’s not about politics, it’s about people. It’s not about legislation or not allowing people to behave in certain ways. It’s not about behavior at all, but the reasons behind it. There will not be change until we stop defining Who and What and deal with Why. A Myriad of beliefs make up Why. Whatever we tell ourselves, in our hearts, day in and day out, becomes what we believe to be true. Evil in equals Evil out. We cannot change the beliefs or replace the evil in anyone else’s heart. We can only change our own, replacing Evil with Love, and take that Love to the world. God’s people must lead the way. Who should understand Love better and deeper than followers of Jesus? We acknowledge the depth of our hypocrisy and seek continual transformation from the One who died of Love for us. If the church is not God’s Love to the world, if we don’t call out “send me,” if we don’t advance in Love from home to neighborhood to nation, then Evil wins. The cliffs stand, bold and strong, and Evil remains entrenched. It will require water, and lots of it, to break them down. It’s time for the church to rise. It’s time to move. It’s time to be the Water. Make Charlottesville the turning point. God’s people must be His Love in waves of good actions to crumble the cliffs of Evil. What Can We Do? Be the Waves When waves crash into cliffs time and time again, the cliffs start to get cracks and crevices. The cliffs lose sediment, bit by bit, slowly weakening and eventually crumbling. Jesus didn’t die so we would believe or behave “correctly.” He died so we would share His Life and Love with others. Without Love we have nothing, can do nothing, are nothing. Love is broader, more varied, and far more powerful than warm fuzzies or romance. We must love deeply, unconditionally, with purpose. We must do everything in love -- every single thing. God’s people must band together to be Love Waves, crashing into the cliffs of Evil again, again, again. Work With the Wind Waves are formed when wind blows. The wind transfers its energy to the water, and the water carries it. The greater the speed, duration, and distance, the larger and more powerful the waves. Waves of Love must be energized with the Wind of the Holy Spirit. Get in God’s Word every day – deeply and open-mindedly. Ponder it when you lie down and get up, in the shower and the car, dinner table and conference table, chapters, songs, and prayers. Drink it down, memorize it, and let it flow from your mind, heart, and tongue. Let the Holy Spirit teach you. Let that Still, Small Voice that says, “This is the way. Walk in it,” transform you. Let the Holy Spirit Wind move you where, when, and how He needs you to go. Focus Forward Toward the Cliffs When the currents flow in one direction and the waves follow, they circulate through the ocean. But when differing currents collide they form whirlpools and waves move in circles rather than forward. The Church has lost its direction, its current. We have become whirlpools, churning against ourselves rather than storming the cliffs. We must focus forward with Love instead of around in jealousy and judgment. How to Be Waves It’s much easier to keep the sediment in the cliff than it is to force it out. But each time the waves hit the cliffs they shake and loosen tiny fragments of sediment and wash them away. While daily change appears imperceptible, over time the effects become clear. It’s much easier to keep a negative mindset in place than to force it out. But each time Love hits, it shakes and loosens tiny fragments of evil and washes them away. We may not perceive daily progress, but over time it will be revealed. For every negative comment you hear, it takes six positive ones to cancel it out. Based on this principle, for every negative, evil action we must give back six positive, loving ones, just to cancel it out its effects. That’s why we must aim higher, choosing a larger ratio to make the change. God’s people as Love Waves must give and do according to a 7:1 ratio, seven acts of love for every one act of evil. To be even more effective we need 8:1, 10:1, 100:1. What does this look like? Find the need. Discover the pain. Notice the evil. Then mow its lawn. Take a meal. Pay the bill. This will not be easy. Your loving actions will be misunderstood, rejected, thwarted. You will make sacrifices. Pain and blood are certainties. But nothing else will bring the change we seek. Love on people. Serve them. Be creative about it. Tell them your Why. And do it seven more times. Better yet, do it with seven or more of your friends. Only then will we turn the tide. #lovewaves #bethelove #loveinaction #turnthetide #dontbethechangebethelove Thank you for reading, sharing, and commenting. If you’d like to receive these posts and updates in your inbox, please head to the Contact Page to subscribe.
Off the Cliff The ground gave way underneath her and the phone fell from her hand. Caroline couldn’t believe what she was hearing. He’d lost his job?! The company simply closed its doors with no warning?! She had been out of work long enough that everything was already stretched to the limit. Outstanding medical bills and repairs to their beater of a car, and they had already driven every cent out of their bank account. They were so behind on the mortgage…this just could not be happening. Love Has a Rope Her doorbell rang. Stacy didn’t wait for a response but walked on in. “I just heard,” Stacy said. “I’m so sorry, Caroline. This is unreal.” She sat down on the floor beside Caroline and held her. “I’m here, and I’m with you through all of this. You are not alone.” Love Throws a Rope Stacy had lost everything through a divorce some years ago. She vividly remembered the day she packed her two kids, and everything she could, into her car and headed to the women’s shelter. She, herself, wasn’t in the clear yet but was definitely back on solid ground. She knew the potential uphill climb Caroline and her husband were facing and vowed she would be there in any way she was able. Stacy hadn’t known Caroline back then. Others had buoyed her, encouraging her and providing what she could not for her kids. “I don’t have any financial answers, but I do have life experience and hope. I can help navigate some of the rockier parts of this mountain. I don’t have much to offer, but what I do have is yours,” she said. Love IS the Rope Caroline pulled back from Stacy’s embrace. A strange peace seeped into her heart. “I don’t know how that helps so much, but it does,” Caroline said. Stacy stayed with her that night until her husband made it home. She put a few frozen pizzas in their freezer for when they needed them. She helped make phone calls to creditors. She looked for what was needed and provided what she could. Stacy rallied others just as others had done for her. Accepting the charity of friends and strangers was unfamiliar to Caroline. She was always the one to put money in the offering plate, not the one who needed to take it out. But she recognized that when you are falling, and someone offers, you only have to stretch out your hand and grab the rope. Love always protects, always trust, always hopes, always perseveres. 1 Corinthians 13:7 #bethelove #betherope #loveinaction Thank you for reading, sharing, and commenting. If you’d like to receive these posts and updates in your inbox, please head to the Contact Page to subscribe
He could feel them following him.
He stopped walking and bent over to tie his sandal. Out of the corner of his eye he saw them pause, whistling and looking around at the sky. He chuckled softly to himself. They’d never be good private investigators. He walked on, stopping to take in the view, check the position of the sun, clearly enjoying playing with them. Finally he decided to put them out of their misery. He turned directly to face them. Cocking his head to the side and smiling, he asked, “What do you want?” The two were gobsmacked. One’s face grew red and the other stammered a bit before spitting out, “Teacher, where are you staying?” The red-faced one smacked his companion’s arm. “Where are you staying? Seriously? THAT’S what you open with?” “Well, YOU weren’t saying anything. You left me there to…” “Fellas,” the teacher interrupted, laughing. “Come and see.” Honestly, if I were following someone and they caught me, I can’t say I’d have come up with any better response than they did. When I’m in awe of or intimidated by someone and get to speak to them face to face, I can barely remember my own name. And it’s really nice when that someone is gracious and kind to me, as Jesus was with these two. Even if they are the most gracious and most kind of all someones, I can’t imagine they would EVER up and invite me to come along. Can you think of anything more unwise, or unsafe, than telling someone you don’t know AT ALL, who is really kind of stalking you, who could potentially be a crazed axe-wielding groupie, to COME WITH YOU AND SEE WHERE YOU ARE STAYING? Wiser and safer responses could include, “Nope, that’s top secret info,” and “I’ll have my people email your people.” Another option would be to give them an address, part ways, then follow them for a while to see if one of them had an axe in his robe. But Jesus? He invited them to come with him directly to where he was staying. Jesus is fearless. He laughs in the face of danger. He is love in action. He knows that if he is going to be God With Us, then arm’s length isn’t going to cut it. He’s about people. He’s about connection. He’s about turning hearts back to the Father. He came to gather up everyone he can, lead them to his Dad, and rejoice as they are adopted as his brothers and sisters. “Come and see,” he says. And the guys do. They spend the rest of the day with him. One of those two was Andrew. Do you know what Andrew did first thing after leaving Jesus? He went and found his brother, Simon Peter, and brought him to God With Us. Except this time, instead of hanging back, Andrew ran back. I’ll bet Peter’s arm was sore from being dragged. Meeting Jesus can make you want to run back, too. Not sure? Come and see. #bethelove #heisnotwhatyouthink #loveinaction #stalkersurprise ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thank you for reading, sharing, and commenting. If you’d like to receive these posts and updates in your inbox, please subscribe. I need to warn you, we use a lot of ’blue language’ on set.”
I shrugged. “I won’t judge you for using it if you won’t judge me for not.” The director smiled. Thus was the acknowledgment of mutual respect and freedom that launched me into the world of independent film. For my Christian friends, I feel I must clarify, this was a “secular” independent film. There are Christian films being made in the area, that’s just not the plot God dropped me in. It’s been a fun, life-giving, mind-expanding few years, and I’ve loved every minute. It’s put me in touch with a wide variety of fun, interesting, intelligent, passionate, hard-working, gifted people…the majority of which do not share my faith. It’s a fine line to walk and one that, sadly, I’ve had far too little practice in and haven’t always done well. My guiding principle has been that I’m here to love the people God puts in front of me, and let God do the rest. Have I loved these new friends well? Could I love better? And most importantly, are they seeing Jesus in me or just seeing me? Which got me to wondering, if Jesus worked on a small, independent film, how would He love people? What would He do? And what would He not do? Here’s my storyboard: He would arrive early. He would do what he was asked to do, without complaining or arguing or even so much as an eye-roll. He would smile and laugh. A lot. And they wouldn’t be patronizing smirks, but would reach clear into his eyes. He would be sure everyone else got lunch before he did. He might even bring lunch to a few who couldn’t get a break to eat. He would go out of his way to help anyone who needed it, even looking for ways to help. He would make a meaningful connection, however brief, with each person he came across. Most would then want to have him over for a fish fry (he might even bring two fish or some bread…). He would answer any religious questions he was asked in a gentle, honest way. He would not spark religious debate by turning every conversation into a religious one out of nowhere. He would not cower, but when yelled at, ignored, dismissed, even abused, he would continue to work hard, forgive, and move on. And I’m pretty sure “blue language” wouldn’t bother him one little bit. #loveinaction #heisnotwhatyouthink #bethelove --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thank you for reading, sharing, and commenting. If you’d like to receive these posts and updates in your inbox, please subscribe. |
Applying nature's principles and systems to personal and cultural development.About CommentsI love to read comments and know how my work is helping you. Please respond with your first AND last names. Anonymous comments will not be read and may be deleted.
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